How to Toilet Train a Toddler: A Guide to Helping Your Toddler Learn

Introduction:

The transition from nappies to using the toilet is a major milestone in your child's development. While it is an exciting step, it is also natural to feel a bit apprehensive about the process of toilet training. This guide provides practical advice and reassuring support to help you and your toddler navigate this process successfully. We understand you may be feeling a mix of emotions—perhaps excited and nervous—and this guide will provide trusted and expert advice on how to toilet train your little one.

(Image: A selection of toilet training essentials: a potty chair, training pants, and a children's book about using the toilet.)

When Is the Right Time to Start Toilet Training?

There is no magic age to begin toilet training. Every child develops at their own pace, and readiness is key. Most toddlers show signs of being ready between 18 and 36 months, but some may be ready earlier or later.
Signs of Readiness:
Look for these signs that your toddler might be ready for toilet training:

Physical Readiness:

Stays dry for at least two hours during the day or after naps.
Has regular, predictable bowel movements.
Can pull down and pull up their own pants.
Can walk to and from the bathroom.

Cognitive Readiness:

Can follow simple instructions.
Understands the words associated with toileting (e.g., "wee," "poo").
Shows an awareness of the need to go (e.g., facial expressions, posture, words).

Emotional Readiness:

Expresses interest in using the toilet or potty.
Shows discomfort with soiled nappies.
Asks to wear "big kid" underwear.

It is important not to rush the process. Starting before your child is truly ready can lead to frustration and setbacks.

(Image: A parent and child reading a book together about using the potty.)

Planning for Success: Preparing for Toilet Training

Before you start, a little preparation can go a long way. Here is how to set the stage for successful toilet training:

Choose Your Approach: Decide whether you will use a potty chair, a toilet seat reducer, or both. A potty chair can be less intimidating for some toddlers, while others prefer to use the "big toilet" like grown-ups.
Gather Supplies: Stock up on:
- A potty chair or toilet seat reducer (or both).
- Plenty of underwear (or training pants, if you choose to use them).
- Easy-to-pull-down pants or skirts.
- A step stool for reaching the toilet.
- Child-friendly hand soap.
- Books about toilet training.
- Small rewards (optional – stickers, stamps, etc.).
Talk About It: Start talking to your toddler about using the toilet or potty in a positive and encouraging way. Read books about toilet training together. Let them see you using the toilet and explain what you are doing.
Choose Your Words: Decide on the words you will use for body parts and bodily functions (e.g., "wee," "poo," "potty," "toilet"). Be consistent with your language.
Create a Routine: Establishing a routine can help your toddler feel more comfortable with the process.
(Image: A toddler proudly showing off their new underwear.)

How to Toilet Train a Toddler: A Step-by-Step Guide

Introduce the Potty/Toilet: Let your toddler explore the potty chair or toilet seat reducer. Allow them to sit on it fully clothed to get used to it.
Regular Potty Breaks: Start incorporating regular potty breaks into your daily routine. Suggest sitting on the potty after waking up, after meals, and before naps and bedtime. Even if nothing happens, it is good practice.
Watch for Signs: Pay close attention to your toddler’s cues that they need to go. They might fidget, hold themselves, or tell you directly.
Celebrate Successes: When your toddler does use the potty or toilet, offer lots of praise and encouragement. A small reward (like a sticker) can also be motivating.
Handle Accidents Gracefully: Accidents will happen. Do not scold or punish your child. Simply clean them up calmly and say something like, "Oops, that is okay. Next time, we will try to make it to the potty."
Make the Switch to Underwear: Once your toddler is having more successes than accidents, transition to underwear (or training pants). This helps them feel the wetness and understand the consequences of not making it to the potty.
Teach Proper Hygiene: Show your toddler how to wipe themselves (front to back for girls) and wash their hands thoroughly after using the toilet.
Be Patient and Consistent: Toilet training takes time and patience. There will be good days and bad days. Stay positive and consistent, and your toddler will eventually get the hang of it.

(Image: A parent helping their toddler wash their hands after using the toilet.)

Night-time Toilet Training:

Staying dry overnight often takes longer than daytime toilet training. Many children still need nappies at night until they are 4 or 5 years old, or even older. Do not rush this process.

Tips for Night-time Training:

Wait for Dry Nappies: Start night-time training when your child consistently wakes up with a dry nappy in the morning.
Limit Fluids Before Bed: Avoid giving large drinks close to bedtime.
Potty Break Before Bed: Make sure your child uses the potty or toilet right before going to sleep.
Use a Mattress Protector: Protect the mattress with a waterproof cover.
Be Prepared for Accidents: Have clean sheets and pyjamas readily available.
Create a Routine: Consistency can make a big difference in night-time training success.

(Image: A child sleeping soundly in their bed.)

Troubleshooting Common Challenges:

Resistance: If your toddler is resisting toilet training, do not push it. Take a break for a few weeks and try again later.
Fear of the Toilet: Some toddlers are afraid of the flushing sound or the feeling of falling in. A potty chair or a toilet seat reducer with handles can help.
Regression: It is common for toddlers to have setbacks, especially during times of stress or change (e.g., a new sibling, starting daycare). Be patient and supportive.
Constipation: Ensure your toddler is drinking enough water and eating plenty of fibre to prevent constipation.

When to Seek Professional Advice:

Consult your Well Child Tamariki Ora nurse, GP, or paediatrician if:

Your child is over 4 years old and still not showing any interest in toilet training.
Your child experiences pain or discomfort when urinating or having bowel movements.
Your child has frequent accidents after being successfully toilet trained for a significant period.
You have any concerns about their progress.

Trust The Toilet Training Process

Toilet training is a process that takes time, consistency, and encouragement. With patience and a positive attitude, you can help your toddler master this important skill.

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Sources:

Health New Zealand |Te Whatu Ora - Routine-Based Toilet Training (Accessed 19 March 2025): https://www.cdhb.health.nz/wp-content/uploads/cds-Toilet-Training.pdf

Plunket | Whānau Āwhina Toilet training your child (Accessed 19 March 2025): https://www.plunket.org.nz/caring-for-your-child/hygiene-and-daily-care…

KidsHealth | Hauora Taitamariki - Toilet Training (Accessed 19 March 2025): https://www.kidshealth.org.nz/toilet-training